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Thursday, July 5, 2007

Common Sex Myths

Myths about sex are prevalent in our society. They occur because people pass off partial information as fact. Or, just as often, they have no information and invent sexual facts using common sense or fantasy sense. The facts get mixed-up because “experts” often change their minds or can’t actually agree, or when they come up with new theories every week, telling us that the theories they introduced last week are actually wrong. A lot of these sex myths seem to be logical, but it is logic that fools us.

Period sex is safe sex – The popular belief is that if a couple has sex during the female’s menstruation period, she can’t get pregnant, since the period disposes off the woman’s egg and the next one is far away. However, this myth is false because the sperm can survive in the vagina for up to seven days, and an egg can survive for three. If the woman has irregular periods and ovulates closer to her period, the egg and sperm transit times get crossed. In a normal 28-day cycle, ovulation occurs two weeks before the next period. So, unless the couple knows the woman’s cycle very intimately, they should not play with fire.

Withdrawal contraception works – It is reasonable to assume that if no sperm is deposited in the female, she won’t get pregnant. However, all men have some pre-ejaculation fluid, which contains little live sperm that will wiggle their way up to the egg to fertilize it without too much trouble at all. This happens whether or not you pull out before you ejaculate.

Homosexual fantasies make one gay or bisexual – Our society is still fairly homophobic. Because it is reasonably new thing to have to deal with, it can be very confusing for people to have homosexual fantasies. In reality, we all fantasize about playing around with another man or woman does not make you gay; it actually makes you curious. Acting on fantasies is different than just having them and only you will know the real story. Homosexual fantasies aren’t really talked about for fear of being labeled as gay, and that is not about to change. If you are unsure of your sexual orientation, speak to a professional counselor or sex therapist.

Penis size matters – Everyone always goes on about big penises and how great they are. A big tool is a sign of manliness. If a man has one, he is undoubtedly the envy of any man with a penis that is even slightly smaller. However, sex does not only involve the penis. Every man should take time to learn to figure out how to work their penises and the rest of their body to the best orgasmic advantage. A couple could use different positions to make love and have a greater chance of hitting the right spots. The clitoris, G-spot, and entrance to the vagina are a woman’s hot spots, but do not forget that some women do not orgasm by penetration alone. Also, a really huge penis can be very painful for women because it hits the cervix. The best way for men to ensure a woman’s sexual satisfaction is to get really good at other things, like oral sex and using your hands.

Women always need tons of foreplay – Since the sexual revolution, men have been criticized for not giving their lovers enough warm-up time. But sometimes, when having spontaneous sex, it is totally acceptable to just get right into it. Also, some women need very little foreplay and they should tell their man whether they need more of it or less of it.

Women want multiple orgasms – The rise of the sexual revolution perpetuated the belief that sex is all about the satisfaction of women after so many years of the opposite. But just because women can have more than one orgasm doesn’t mean they want more than one. One is usually fine; two may be great, but any more than that could push the boundaries of wear and tear, and boredom as well. Unless the woman wants it and asks for more, after one or two, she probably feels kind of like men do after they finish: tired.

Orgasms are the be all and end all of good sex – We are trained to believe that the point of having sex is to have an orgasm. The orgasm is often the first question that gets asked when someone relates a sexual experience to a friend. In reality, good sex is good because both people have a great time, not because both are totally physically spent by amazing orgasms. Having a mind-blowing orgasm can be great, but they do not define fabulous sex. If any one misses out on the orgasm it is usually the woman, which is bad news if the man makes a habit out of it, but not essential for a good session. Women do not enjoy fake orgasms. Of course they want real ones, but they also want you to know that sex can be good without them—sometimes.

Men can’t have an orgasm without ejaculating – Men are just as capable as women are of having multiple orgasms even without ejaculation. It’s just that it is more difficult to attain it. There are a couple of methods: One is by effectively blocking the ejaculation fluid from escaping by holding the base of the penis just before ejaculation. The other is by erotic prostate massage. An orgasm from massaging the prostate is far more intense than a normal orgasm, and is felt throughout the entire body. The best way to experiment with prostate massage is to buy a specially-made sex toy.

Men don’t have a G-Spot – Both men and women have their own G-spots. In the case of men, the G-spot is actually the prostate gland. Unfortunately, it is a little more difficult to access than a woman’s because it can only be reached through the anus. A finger is inserted in the anus, making its way to the direction to the man’s bellybutton, until it feels a lump about the size of a nut. Stimulating the prostate in this way is also very healthy because it floods the prostate with fresh blood that contains plenty of oxygen and nutrients. If you have sexual dysfunction or prostate problems, this procedure can really help.

Ejaculation affects athletic performance – It is an old Eastern philosophy that ejaculating drains the male body of its “life force,” bringing down its testosterone levels. This “life force” gives men energy, and testosterone gives them more aggression. The myth pertains to logic, but the reason you feel sleepy after ejaculation is because of the chemicals that are triggered during the ejaculation process are sleep inducing. Regarding the lowered testosterone levels; scientific studies have found that having sex actually increases testosterone levels. In fact, three months of abstaining makes a man’s testosterone levels drop to that of a child’s, which does not bode well for the increased aggressing or energy necessary for the edge in some sports. Overall, if you want to do it, go for it. If you find it affects your performance, just don’t do it the next time.

Smaller breasts are more sensitive – There is a scientific fact that on average, human breasts receive the same amount of sensory neurons regardless of their size. The logical conclusion would be that, due to its density, smaller breasts are more sensitive to touch. The truth is, breast—particularly the nipple—are sensitive the majority of the time for most women. The sensitivity of the breast morphs throughout her cycle: at some points her breasts will be larger or smaller, tender, sometimes painful, and sometimes more sexually sensitive.

Men are always ready for sex – Socially, men are the demons of sex. They always want it, they never get enough, and they are always ready for it just in case some willing female happens to jump upon their path. But this myth neglects the part that men are human beings and aren’t always in the mood. Further more, men don’t always want to be in the mood. There are many reasons for men not want to have sex, including stress, illness, fatigue, and just not being in the mood. Men should not be afraid to say no sometimes, but they should make sure that they explain to their women because they will be confused. After all, women probably think that men are always ready for sex, aren’t they?

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