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Thursday, July 5, 2007

The Difference Between Men and Women in a Relationship

Just like when they say “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus,” the opposite sex are literally polar opposites when it comes to relationships, especially in thought process, sensitivity, memory, and communication.

A successful relationship is one that recognizes that difference and is able to get beyond the he said/ she said scenarios. Here are some notable variations.

Difference in solving problems – Both sexes are capable of solving problems equally well. However, the thought process involved in coming to a resolution varies between men and women. For men, a problem is an opportunity for them to demonstrate their problem-solving skills in a quick and efficient manner. Men see having the problem solved as the ultimate goal and they believe that the best solution is the one that is the quickest as well as the most efficient. Meanwhile, women see a problem as an opportunity to work together and reach a resolution. Women relish the chance to communicate about the problem and the act of working together to solve the problem is more important than actually solving the problem.

Difference in sensitivity – Women have a heightened sense of sensitivity relative to men, resulting to women being more prone to act on their emotions rather than on rational thought. A woman's sensitivity allows her to understand her own feelings as well as those of others better so her reactions tend to take feelings into consideration above logic. However, men do not have the same level of sensitivity and therefore are more likely to make their decisions based on logic. This disparity can result in problems during a relationship because women assume that men intentionally tried to hurt their feelings while men may grow frustrated if he believes women made an irrational decision.

Difference in memory – Men have a memory that is stronger in situations where they can recall the details of an event by making an association with something concrete like a location or item. For instance, men are more apt to remember an event that took place in a location that they are able to visualize well. Women, on the other hand, have a memory that is stronger when they are able to associate the emotions felt with that memory to other memories where they have similar emotions. This type of memory is especially problematic because when women become angry with their partner, they are often able to recall other situations where men have angered her. Unless the difference in memory is recognized, it can become a source of frustration in a relationship.

Difference in communication style – Men tend to be more introspective about their problems and choose to deal with them internally and without discussing them with their partner. When they do decide to discuss a problem, it's usually after much thought and careful consideration. Meanwhile, women enjoy conversing about their problems with their partner and believe that doing do helps them to understand their problem better and come to a solution more easily. Women often use communication as a method for reaching a conclusion, and view the discussion as a way to figure out a solution.

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