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Thursday, July 5, 2007

How to Break Up

Breaking up is rarely easy. You both have feelings for each other at one point, and maybe you still do. And when it's time to end the relationship, sometimes things get out of hand. The key is to do it maturely, without deliberate pain, in order for both of you move on with your lives and find someone better suited for each other.
Acknowledge that the relationship is really over – Come to terms with your own feeling and make a firm decision to end the relationship.

Be honest – Although break-ups can be really hard on relationships, honesty salvages any possible future friendships.

Do not delay the inevitable – Once you decide to break up with your partner, think immediately on how, when, and where you will take action. Do not drag out a pointless relationship.

Select a private place – Breaking up is not a public affair. A secluded area in the park or your partner's house can do. Find or schedule an appropriate time to meet and be alone with your partner as you tell him or her the bad news.

Never break up on the phone – Not only it is rude, it also gives an impression that you took the relationship for granted.

Approach the topic when both of you are calm and rational – Never break up right after an argument (you might regret it later on). Also, announcing a break up in heated moments would just make the fighting worse.

Deliver the news personally – Tell your partner that you feel that this relationship on its current level needs to end.

Be firm and decisive – Help your partner understand why you want to end the relationship. Remember to be tactful, not brutal.

Be grateful of your partner – Remind him or her that you'll never forget the positive qualities in your relationship, but emphasize that you're ready to move on with your life.

Give your partner closure – He or she needs to accept the break-up. Answer questions and talk it over instead of leaving loose ends. Stay positive as you both make plans to go your separate ways.

More often than not, breaking up is as hard on the person ending the relationship as it is on the person being broken up with. Don't assume just because a person is breaking up with you means that they no longer care about you. Remember that caring about the person is different from wanting a relationship with the person.

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